From Buzzword Bingo to Bullsh*t Binge-O

There has always been a good game in boring corporate meetings or conferences - Buzzword Bingo. First person to count 10 Corporatese sayings wins (this got to be far more fun with IM, and a real hoot with Twitter). But that was soooooo 2008, dahlings.

Now Paul Carr has evolved the game to new heights, using the newest form of social intercourse - videostreaming - and the oldest, alcohol. The (un)inspiration was the fairly insipid (that's not inspired spelled wrong btw) collection of startups on Day One at TechCrunch50 (we were even prompted to write about Companies we wanted to see there):

The rules are simple – we start tomorrow at 9am (Pacific). Get up early, grab yourself a case of beer and then either sit in the room or, if you had better things to do with three grand, tune into the live stream and follow these simple instructions…

Take a sip when…
- Someone uses the word “freemium” or describes something as a “chicken-egg problem”.
- Someone makes a borderline misogynistic remark to the only female judge: (e.g. “That fashion company really made Marissa perk up”)
- Someone claims that their aim is to change the world.
- Someone claims that their aim isn’t to change the world.
- Someone says “that’s a great question” in response to a judge, when they clearly want to say “go fuck yourself”.

Take a swig when…
- Someone actually tells a judge to go fuck themself.
- The wifi works so well that it breaks someone’s pitch.
- Yossi Vardi forces everyone to give an awkward round of applause for absolutely no reason.
- Someone makes a joke about Michael Arrington in their pitch. (And take a second swig when that joke inevitably falls flat)
- It becomes clear to everyone that the success of a particular company would result in the world becoming a terrible, terrible place.

Drain your whole drink when…
- Two founders walk on to the stage wearing identical shirts.
- Someone sings during their pitch, or a lady starts to dance.
- Jason Calacanis alludes to his personal wealth, mentions Tesla or quotes a Disney movie when giving advice to a startup.
- Someone tries to bribe the entire room with cupcakes.

Drain your drink and chug an entire fresh one when…

- Someone tries to bribe the entire room with a car.

You're allowed to throw 'em both up if its a Toyota Pious. Oh, what......it was a Pious?. For UK readers, 9am Pacific is 5pm GMT, ie Pimms O'Clock, so a perfect time to start. For New York readers, take an early lunch for Manhattans.

Now why, I hear you ask, is a sober blog like Broadstuff giving airtime to debauched drinking games, instead of reporting on the TechCrunch50 companies. There are 2 answers to this:

(1) Hyp...I mean sober reporting of the TC50 is being done, in spades, all over the web. If anything, we should be filtering them as a service , albeit through beer goggles may not be your optimum approach

(2) Actually, we think this is more innovative than any of the companies - social media based drinking games will be a hot trend in 2010, once the bankers have crashed the economy again while making off with your bailout money, and the government is taxing your kids' future income till the pips of your unborn grandchildren squeak

Besides, If I recall correctly, the best way to spot the winner the last few years has been to spot the "startup" with huge amounts of SV in-crowd funding and corporate support already